Workin' 9 to 5 (What a Way to Make a Livin')


After 15 glorious months of full-time writing, I'm back to the ol' office job. To bring you up to speed, here's a quick quiz...

1  My day job is:
a)  butt-scratching
b)  ball-busting
c)  talking about shopping with angry people (ie Consumer Affairs)
correct answer: c (a and b also occasionally correct)

2  In the month I've been back, I've advised customers on our helpline about:
a)  a roadside pumpkin shop
b)  taxidermied rabbits
c)  more head-slappingly dumb deals than I can count
d)  all of the above
correct answer: d

3  I've been writing articles in my spare time for:
a)  Period Monthly and Flexes Muscles Weekly
b)  a dog magazine and a top fashion glossy
c)  magazines about tattooed women and bathroom renovations
correct answer: b

4  Since my return, I've become addicted to:
a)  cocaine
b)  stealing office supplies
c)  watermelon juice
d)  all of the above
correct answer: c

5  I plan to stay in this office job:
a)  to keep getting lucrid perks like pre-chewed biros and cut-price neon lighting
b)  until I write that bestseller and then I'll disappear with a PEOWWWWRR like Road Runner
c)  dunno, kinda enjoying it some days, but I do wanna go back to writing full-time
correct answer: c (I'll also pay b)

How long do you reckon I'll last caged in a cubicle again? My money's on 6 months, but we'll see...

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